Hyderabad is on high alert too,
Telangana sentiment like a bad 'flu.
Terrorists and politicians raising a racket-
They can't stand the peace and quiet.
Monday, February 15, 2010
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
Top 5 for 2010
I am not a very creative person. The last creative idea I had was 3 months and 9 days ago. The idea was abolishment of income tax. Like all ideas that come ahead of their time, this idea was shot down by Bengali ministers and Madrassi bureaucrats.
Frequent visitors (giggle) to this blog are already aware that quality journalism and predictions both originate from a certain inability to be creative and imaginative. Having established beyond all doubt that my creativity is matched only by the intellect behind the Tharoor tweets, here is my predicted list of the top 5 news items for 2010.
1. No thaw in global cooling talks
Special Correspondent, Mogadishu, November 11, 2010
The fortnight long summit on global cooling is likely to close without any agreement between the developed and the developing countries, say sources closely involved in the ongoing negotiations.
Readers will recall that the summit was hurriedly organised after a study by Prof. Kinshau Lagta of Mogadishu University conclusively proved that the planet goes through 5000 year cycles of heating up and cooling down. According to the study while the heating phase is gradual and peaks only at the end of the phase, the cooling phase is much faster and average global temperatures drop by upto 7 degree centigrade during the first 35 years of the cooling phase. Prof. Magta, who recently won the Nobel Peace prize for his iconoclastic work, has also predicted that most parts of Europe and North America will go above the permanent snow line, if no swift action is taken to control the cooling. According to the study, the cooling cycle started on 1st October 2009 which was substantiated by freezing winters in the Northern Hemisphere.
According to estimates, an equivalent of 20 Million hectares of forest needs to be removed every year in order to limit the global cooling to within 3 degrees of 1990 levels. NASA and ISRO, in a joint study confirmed the estimates and have also found water on Mars.
President Obama held a night long closed door discussion with the ACIDIC countries comprising Azerbaijan, Cambodia, Indonesia, Dubai, Iran and Chad. Insiders say that the ACIDIC countries are standing their ground in their demands for larger aid and compensation for undertaking the felling of trees; and a stimulus package in order to sell more cars. It is also said that there are no clear agreements on how the DDD initiatives (denudation, desertification and destruction) will be monitored and evaluated. While the developed countries are said to be steadfast in their demands for an UN agency, headed by Indian MoS Shashi Tharoor, to act as the evaluator, the ACIDIC countries have refused such a mechanism, terming it hedonistic and unwarranted.
The BASIC countries also engaged in several rounds of consultations followed by a press brief by Jayaram Ramesh, Indian MoEF. Brazil has confirmed that all felling of trees has been stopped in the Amazon forests due to lack of financial aid from the Developed countries. The Chinese Government has increased taxes on private cars driven by fossil fuels and has announced a USD 450 billion package for creating public transport infrastructure. Detailing the stance of the Indian Government, Mr. Ramesh said that any policy changes will have to wait till the government prepares its next Five year plan, which is to be implemented from 2013 onwards.
In a brief meeting with Media Persons, President Obama said that the Summit has been a success and the time for change has come. He also clarified that by change he did not mean climate change and that in fact he was opposed to any change if it leads to climate change. – Details on Page 3.
2. From Quantitiave easing to quantitative teasing
Jet Phoa, New York, September 14
After almost two years of easy liquidity, businesses are bracing to face cash shortages due to the renewed government policy of announcing liquidity injecting schemes without any money to back it up.
The Federal Reserve, in its weekly press briefing highlighted the problems with implementing further quantitative easing. The report stated that 3 out of the 5 currency printing units of the Bureau of Engravings and Printing are currently out of paper. The Fed has had to shut down the other two plants due to the escalating prices of currency quality ink. Currency quality ink has seen a 330 fold jump since the collapse of the investment bank Lehman Brothers. Ben Bernanke, Chairman of the Federal Reserve, had on Tuesday last, denied reports that the cost of printing a dollar is now 12 times the real value of the greenback. Traders took this statement as proof that there is further headroom for increase in ink prices. Ink prices were up by 20% during the day trade at Nymex.
Paper and ink have already become the most precious commodities by weight. During the last week, two Asian central banks, of India and China, are said to have exchanged USD 6000 Trillion of gold for paper and ink. Indian Finance Minister, Mr. Pranab Mukherjee has clarified that paper is an important driver of Indian democracy/bureaucracy and the ink is being stocked up in light of the advertising requirements for the forthcoming commonwealth games and provincial elections. The Reserve Bank of India has issued notifications to the affect that in order to curb inflationary headwinds; it does not plan to print any more currency and has requested Nepalese authorities to also temporarily slow down the printing of Indian currency. Chinese authorities have refused comment on the subject.
President Obama, speaking at a Democratic Party seminar in Arkansas, reiterated that the time for change in the technology currently in place for printing of dollars is here. The government is considering several options including buying dollars from China. China has already proved that it can print dollars at half the price that it takes to print the dollar in the United States. The President also announced a ‘cash for blunders’ programme to promote self printing of cash by small businesses. This scheme was previously limited to large firms with annual revenues exceeding USD 100 billion. However, considering the prices of ink and paper, economists are questioning the effectiveness of such a programme.
In a related development, customers of the Bank of America in Austin, Texas were taken aback when the currency withdrawn by them through automated teller machines had the picture of Chinese Premier Wen Jiabao alongwith that of President Lincoln. Beijing has accused United States government of sabotage and conspiracy to revalue the Renminbi.
3. Sachin announces retirement
Vimal Thekar, Mumbai, July27
Sachin Tendulkar today announced his retirement from all forms of International T20 cricket. He, however, clarified that he will be available for non-international T20 tournaments such as the Indian Premier League, Champions League and Bandra Super League.
On being enquired about his plans for other formats of the game he said that he is currently enjoying playing the game and has not thought about retirement plans.
4. Baba Ramdev to be PM, Amar gets Home, Chidambaram Health
PM retires, New Government on Thursday
Prabhat Kumar, New Delhi/Haridwar, June 8
Following a day of unprecedented political turmoil, Prime Minister Dr. Manmohan Singh submitted his resignation to the President Pratibha Patil. This was preceded by a riotous 3 hour long Congress Working Committee Meeting where members conveyed their unflinching support for Baba to the high command. The meeting concluded with a resolution that Baba should immediately take over the reins of the Government and a final decision on the issue to be taken by the Party High Command.
Congress supporters inside the 7 Race Course Road could be heard Shouting Baba’s name throughout the stormy meeting. An hour after the CWC meeting concluded at noon, under serious pressure from Baba supporters, Congress President Sonia Gandhi announced that Baba Ramdev will be taking over from Dr. Manmohan Singh.
In a prepared text issued by the PMO, Dr. Singh cited health reasons for his resignation. After the 4 minute meeting with President Pratibha Patil at Rashtrapati Bhavan, Dr. Singh informed the media persons present that he shall be spending more time on writing urdu poetry. He has already invited former PM AB Vajpayee to release his first book of poems.
Taken by surprise by the turn of political events, Mr. Baba Ramdev’s office in Haridwar did not allow media persons to meet Baba Ramdev. Senior correspondents including Vinod Mehta and N Ram were observed doing Pranayams in Baba’s Haridwar Ashram.
In a late night press conference, Baba Ramdev thanked Dr Singh for his committed services to the nation. He also thanked Congress President Sonia Gandhi for reposing faith in him. On the question of Cabinet reshuffle, Mr. Ramdev confirmed that Home Minister Chidamabaram will be moved to Health Ministry. Mr. Amar Singh, who joined the Congress Party last week will move into North Block.
In related developments, supporters of Mr. Rahul Gandhi have sought a meeting with the high command to clear the misunderstanding that has led to the fracas. According to Ms. Jayanti Natarajan, the congress workers wanted Mr. Rahul Gandhi appointed as Prime Minister and Not Mr. Baba Ramdev. Ms. Natarajan clarified that Mr. Gandhi was popularly known as Rahul Baba in Congress circles.
5. India Beats Sri Lanka in another ODI
Special Correspondent, Nanded, March 11
India defeated Sri Lanka after being beaten by them yesterday, however they had won the day before after the two consecutive losses they suffered two day earlier (You know this story).
BCCI proposes ODI and T20 on the same day. To be tried out against Sri Lanka (You know this story too).
Frequent visitors (giggle) to this blog are already aware that quality journalism and predictions both originate from a certain inability to be creative and imaginative. Having established beyond all doubt that my creativity is matched only by the intellect behind the Tharoor tweets, here is my predicted list of the top 5 news items for 2010.
1. No thaw in global cooling talks
Special Correspondent, Mogadishu, November 11, 2010
The fortnight long summit on global cooling is likely to close without any agreement between the developed and the developing countries, say sources closely involved in the ongoing negotiations.
Readers will recall that the summit was hurriedly organised after a study by Prof. Kinshau Lagta of Mogadishu University conclusively proved that the planet goes through 5000 year cycles of heating up and cooling down. According to the study while the heating phase is gradual and peaks only at the end of the phase, the cooling phase is much faster and average global temperatures drop by upto 7 degree centigrade during the first 35 years of the cooling phase. Prof. Magta, who recently won the Nobel Peace prize for his iconoclastic work, has also predicted that most parts of Europe and North America will go above the permanent snow line, if no swift action is taken to control the cooling. According to the study, the cooling cycle started on 1st October 2009 which was substantiated by freezing winters in the Northern Hemisphere.
According to estimates, an equivalent of 20 Million hectares of forest needs to be removed every year in order to limit the global cooling to within 3 degrees of 1990 levels. NASA and ISRO, in a joint study confirmed the estimates and have also found water on Mars.
President Obama held a night long closed door discussion with the ACIDIC countries comprising Azerbaijan, Cambodia, Indonesia, Dubai, Iran and Chad. Insiders say that the ACIDIC countries are standing their ground in their demands for larger aid and compensation for undertaking the felling of trees; and a stimulus package in order to sell more cars. It is also said that there are no clear agreements on how the DDD initiatives (denudation, desertification and destruction) will be monitored and evaluated. While the developed countries are said to be steadfast in their demands for an UN agency, headed by Indian MoS Shashi Tharoor, to act as the evaluator, the ACIDIC countries have refused such a mechanism, terming it hedonistic and unwarranted.
The BASIC countries also engaged in several rounds of consultations followed by a press brief by Jayaram Ramesh, Indian MoEF. Brazil has confirmed that all felling of trees has been stopped in the Amazon forests due to lack of financial aid from the Developed countries. The Chinese Government has increased taxes on private cars driven by fossil fuels and has announced a USD 450 billion package for creating public transport infrastructure. Detailing the stance of the Indian Government, Mr. Ramesh said that any policy changes will have to wait till the government prepares its next Five year plan, which is to be implemented from 2013 onwards.
In a brief meeting with Media Persons, President Obama said that the Summit has been a success and the time for change has come. He also clarified that by change he did not mean climate change and that in fact he was opposed to any change if it leads to climate change. – Details on Page 3.
2. From Quantitiave easing to quantitative teasing
Jet Phoa, New York, September 14
After almost two years of easy liquidity, businesses are bracing to face cash shortages due to the renewed government policy of announcing liquidity injecting schemes without any money to back it up.
The Federal Reserve, in its weekly press briefing highlighted the problems with implementing further quantitative easing. The report stated that 3 out of the 5 currency printing units of the Bureau of Engravings and Printing are currently out of paper. The Fed has had to shut down the other two plants due to the escalating prices of currency quality ink. Currency quality ink has seen a 330 fold jump since the collapse of the investment bank Lehman Brothers. Ben Bernanke, Chairman of the Federal Reserve, had on Tuesday last, denied reports that the cost of printing a dollar is now 12 times the real value of the greenback. Traders took this statement as proof that there is further headroom for increase in ink prices. Ink prices were up by 20% during the day trade at Nymex.
Paper and ink have already become the most precious commodities by weight. During the last week, two Asian central banks, of India and China, are said to have exchanged USD 6000 Trillion of gold for paper and ink. Indian Finance Minister, Mr. Pranab Mukherjee has clarified that paper is an important driver of Indian democracy/bureaucracy and the ink is being stocked up in light of the advertising requirements for the forthcoming commonwealth games and provincial elections. The Reserve Bank of India has issued notifications to the affect that in order to curb inflationary headwinds; it does not plan to print any more currency and has requested Nepalese authorities to also temporarily slow down the printing of Indian currency. Chinese authorities have refused comment on the subject.
President Obama, speaking at a Democratic Party seminar in Arkansas, reiterated that the time for change in the technology currently in place for printing of dollars is here. The government is considering several options including buying dollars from China. China has already proved that it can print dollars at half the price that it takes to print the dollar in the United States. The President also announced a ‘cash for blunders’ programme to promote self printing of cash by small businesses. This scheme was previously limited to large firms with annual revenues exceeding USD 100 billion. However, considering the prices of ink and paper, economists are questioning the effectiveness of such a programme.
In a related development, customers of the Bank of America in Austin, Texas were taken aback when the currency withdrawn by them through automated teller machines had the picture of Chinese Premier Wen Jiabao alongwith that of President Lincoln. Beijing has accused United States government of sabotage and conspiracy to revalue the Renminbi.
3. Sachin announces retirement
Vimal Thekar, Mumbai, July27
Sachin Tendulkar today announced his retirement from all forms of International T20 cricket. He, however, clarified that he will be available for non-international T20 tournaments such as the Indian Premier League, Champions League and Bandra Super League.
On being enquired about his plans for other formats of the game he said that he is currently enjoying playing the game and has not thought about retirement plans.
4. Baba Ramdev to be PM, Amar gets Home, Chidambaram Health
PM retires, New Government on Thursday
Prabhat Kumar, New Delhi/Haridwar, June 8
Following a day of unprecedented political turmoil, Prime Minister Dr. Manmohan Singh submitted his resignation to the President Pratibha Patil. This was preceded by a riotous 3 hour long Congress Working Committee Meeting where members conveyed their unflinching support for Baba to the high command. The meeting concluded with a resolution that Baba should immediately take over the reins of the Government and a final decision on the issue to be taken by the Party High Command.
Congress supporters inside the 7 Race Course Road could be heard Shouting Baba’s name throughout the stormy meeting. An hour after the CWC meeting concluded at noon, under serious pressure from Baba supporters, Congress President Sonia Gandhi announced that Baba Ramdev will be taking over from Dr. Manmohan Singh.
In a prepared text issued by the PMO, Dr. Singh cited health reasons for his resignation. After the 4 minute meeting with President Pratibha Patil at Rashtrapati Bhavan, Dr. Singh informed the media persons present that he shall be spending more time on writing urdu poetry. He has already invited former PM AB Vajpayee to release his first book of poems.
Taken by surprise by the turn of political events, Mr. Baba Ramdev’s office in Haridwar did not allow media persons to meet Baba Ramdev. Senior correspondents including Vinod Mehta and N Ram were observed doing Pranayams in Baba’s Haridwar Ashram.
In a late night press conference, Baba Ramdev thanked Dr Singh for his committed services to the nation. He also thanked Congress President Sonia Gandhi for reposing faith in him. On the question of Cabinet reshuffle, Mr. Ramdev confirmed that Home Minister Chidamabaram will be moved to Health Ministry. Mr. Amar Singh, who joined the Congress Party last week will move into North Block.
In related developments, supporters of Mr. Rahul Gandhi have sought a meeting with the high command to clear the misunderstanding that has led to the fracas. According to Ms. Jayanti Natarajan, the congress workers wanted Mr. Rahul Gandhi appointed as Prime Minister and Not Mr. Baba Ramdev. Ms. Natarajan clarified that Mr. Gandhi was popularly known as Rahul Baba in Congress circles.
5. India Beats Sri Lanka in another ODI
Special Correspondent, Nanded, March 11
India defeated Sri Lanka after being beaten by them yesterday, however they had won the day before after the two consecutive losses they suffered two day earlier (You know this story).
BCCI proposes ODI and T20 on the same day. To be tried out against Sri Lanka (You know this story too).
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